Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Katie Solves the World Economic Crisis

...via spending copious amounts of her hard earned money* at Nordstrom. I spent my afternoon getting lost in the racks of overpriced denim and dresses by Diane von Furstenberg that make me want to sell my kidneys in order to call them mine and see them hanging in my closet...And yes, I do feel as dirty for admitting that as you do for reading it. FML.

"But Katie, why did you leave me on the rack? YOU COULD'VE SAVED THE ECONOMY!"

* A message to my aunts: I spent nearly none of MY money...I spent gift cards. So really, I'm not solving any crisis except the one raging in my head as to what to buy with my Christmas gift cards. So don't freak out. K? K. Now you've made me admit that I'm a liar.

But, here is what I bought with Hannah's gift card/Aunt Pat and Aunt Julie's gift card:

Michael by Michael Kors "Camden" platform... they're like buttah

A conversation with Olivia about lingerie:
Where: Kitchen
Who: Katie and Liv
When: ca. 7:20 a.m

Livi: [looking at an US Weekly page with lingerie on it]: That is inappropriate.
Katie: Yeah, well...it's a magazine. I dunno.
Livi: It's weird looking...
Katie: The worst thing about stuff like that is how uncomfortable it is! And no one even really sees it.
Livi: Well, some people see it!
Livi: Yeah, ok, but sometimes not. People get crazy in Las Vegas!
Katie: Vegas?
Livi: Yes! I don't know what people do there! It's crazy!

Livi, on "Barney, the Dinosaur" and why he is no longer on TV:
"They found drugs and cigars in his tail. That's why he got canceled."

He's got cigars. In his tail.

Tuesdays...woof. Up at 6:45 --> pulled on the same sweat pants I was wearing yesterday --> breakfast for Liv--> lunch for liv (strawberries, cheese and crackers, yogo bites. Yum??) --> Diet Coke for Katie --> Drop off at Baker --> Back to NU for German --> Failure at German quiz --> Work --> Class --> Shopping -->Pick up Liv at Baker --> home --> Homework --> blogging....

future plans include: more homework; driving Livi to soccer, then picking her up; spinning; shower; dinner; BED. Hot damn, I lead an exciting life.

Today's failtastic event: So, I'm sitting in my German class, minding my own business, spacing out, when I get asked, "Carolin, wo wohnst du?" (Katie, where do you live?) to which I respond, "Ich wohne in Evanston." "Ja, klar..." (Yes, clearly...) says Frau Meuser, and then follows up with, "Aber, WO wohnst du? Im Apartment? Im Haus?" Naturally, the correct response is, "Ich wohne im Haus." Unfortunately, I said, "Ich wohne im Apartment." So, I quickly covered up and shout, "Nein! Ich wohne im Haus..." I already look like an idiot who doesn't know where she lives, but WAIT there's more! With the other twelve students now staring at me, Frau Meuser asks if I have any roommates. Now, I could just move on with my life and have said "no". Unfortunately for me, I said, "Ja! Ich habe drei mitbewohnerin." (Yeah! I have three roommates). "Wie?" (Who?)...and this is where the story takes a turn for the worst. I blurt out, "Fuck! No! I mean, Ich habe kein Mitbewohner....Oh god! I said fuck! I'm sorry!" Yep. That's how I roll. Swearing at my teachers. Frau Meuser, though a little stunned, looked at me and said, "du hast kein Mitbewohner, order drei?" (You have no roommates, or three?) To which I respond, "Shit, I...ich wohne mit meine Tante und meine Kusine. Shit, I just swore again! Oh my god I'm so sorry! I'm just really tired...this isn't going well. I'm sorry. Shit. I'm sorry." Frau Meuser just sort of looked at me and said, "oh, Carolin!!" before turning away, clearly befuddled at my lack of ability to speak German AND English. Not only do my classmates now think I live in some sort of crazy house with maybe some other people, or maybe not, but they also think that I have turrets. F. M. L.

Hero of the day: Gertrude Bell. This is one hell of a lady. An archaeologist and historian at a time when both fields were considered "boys clubs", she was known for exploring Ancient Babylonian archaeological sites with camels laden with trunks full of pearls, furs, and china. After World War I, Bell, alongside the likes of T.E Lawrence (aka Lawrence of Arabia) and Winston Churchill, took part in a conference to decide the fate of Ottoman lands. She became the friggin' DIRECTOR OF ANTIQUITIES IN IRAQ and founded the Iraq Archaeological Museum. What a BAMF!

That's right Churchill, I want to appoint Faisal the King. Done and done. Now, where are my pearls, bitches?

Currently listening to: You're So Vain by Carley Simon (Livi put it on her iPod...it's awkward for everyone)
Currently reading: Audacity of Hope by President Obama
Currently craving: Spring.

It's like the flowers are mocking me. FUCK YOU TOO, DAFFODILS!

Peace, Love, and douchebag perennials.



  1. i must say that your life (not to mention your wardrobe) is much more exciting than mine.
    and yes,i do know what fml means.
    potty mouth.

  2. "Tourette's"

    Apart from that, BRAVO!

  3. i literally told tina what FML mean about 16 hours before she posted that.

    bravo, kate. except for that whole german thing... hablamos español aqui. me entiendas?


  4. hope, please do not post under my name if you are going to use poor grammar.

  5. You two and by that I mean Hope and Tina] need your own blog.

    I do agree, however, on this: Hablamos espanol...vamos a olvidar aleman'